Safety Tips
Contrary to popular belief, in the event of a real-life encounter with Dustin Brown, doorways will offer no protection. But there are a few things that you can do to help yourself be prepared for such an event.
• Health insurance premiums should be paid and current. If possible, opt for a higher premium/lower co-pay.
• Avoid wearing the colors orange, teal, blue, desert red, yellow, Motor City red, light red, green, mustard yellow, dark red, light blue, or red.
• Never pretend to be invincible.
• Practice walking on crutches ahead of time. This will ease your transition into recovery.
• Avoid sudden movements around Dustin Brown. This can be seen as a sign of aggression.
• Never make eye contact with Dustin Brown. This can be seen as a sign of aggression.
• Never breathe in the presence of Dustin Brown. This can be seen as a sign of aggression.
• Just don't do anything at all. This can be seen as a sign of aggression.
• Wear clean underwear.
• And finally: Keep your head up, Cookie.
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